Super Duper Special Crazy Tuesday! Or, alternately, the 5th of February

Abu Muqawama steers clear of presidential politics on most days, but today is the closest thing the U.S. has to a national primary, and from what this blogger has seen, our democratic process has actually been followed with a great deal of interest by the rest of the world and might be restoring a little faith in American democracy. Incredibly, three of the four viable candidates for president are not torturing nutjobs. And people back home in the States are fired up too, especially those who have contracted Obamania. One of Abu Muqawama's high school English teachers composed a "Miltonic Sonnet" for Barack Obama and sent it to everyone he knows trying to get them to vote for the Illinois senator. Abu Muqawama's own mother excitedly told him over email last night that she's walking into the voting booth today with her middle finger extended to her fellow middle-aged white female voters and casting her ballot for Obama as well. (And she actually likes Hillary. A lot. Note to HRC, though: Messing with Jim Cooper wins you few friends in the Volunteer State. You might as well slap Howard Baker in broad daylight.) That said, if you are a U.S. citizen and happen to live abroad, you might still be able to vote.

If you are Democrat, go to Democrats Abroad and find out where your closest voting center is. If you're in London (like Abu Muqawama), that voting center would be near Paddington:

UNITED KINGDOM – London
Tuesday, February 5 18:00 – 22:30
Porchester Hall, Porchester Road, Bayswater
Contact: [email protected]

If you're a Republican... WTF... Abu Muqawama looked and looked on the Republicans Abroad for a polling station in London last night, but apparently, there isn't one. Can't a man cast his vote for John McCain and Freedom from abroad? You can, however, register to vote for the general election. Which is cool as, unlike the Democrats, you pretty much already know who your nominee is.

Update: FFT (Former Flatmate Theo) reports Democrats Abroad is better organized than Republicans Abroad and that Republicans abroad cannot vote in the primaries. Hmph. (This is perhaps the first time the words "Democrats" and "better organized" have ever been used together in a sentence.)

Update II: Abu Muqawama's Louisiana relatives would be horrified if he did not mention it is Fat Tuesday (or, Mardi Gras for all our francophone/fraternity readers) in addition to Super Duper Special Crazy Tuesday. Just 24 hours until we get to wander around with a smudge mark on our foreheads that people on public transportation offer to rub off for us. Last year, this drunk guy was being a jerk to all the passengers on a bus in DC and Abu Muqawama was about to deck him when he remembered the ashes on his forehead and that it would probably be sending the wrong message about Jesus if he started a fistfight on the S2 bus going up 16th Street on Ash Wednesday.

Update III: McCain, for his part, has refused to engage with Limbaugh, telling reporters: "I don't listen to him. There's a certain trace of masochism in my family, but not that deep."